Look At The Stars

Look At The Stars

‘Look at the stars, Look how they shine for you”
I pondered what is it about Coldplay that amazes me so much. I just cannot seem to get Chris Martin’s voice out of my head and the lyrics as well but no fussing over that, having Coldplay songs stuck inside your head is one thing I don’t mind. 
That line though does get me thinking ‘Who do the stars shine for?’ 
Wouldn’t it be amazing if we all had a star that shone just for us. You feel a little low just step out on your terrace and look up and lo and behold there it is shining a little brighter from up there, reassuring you that it is going to be all right, there are going to be cloudy nights as well like it faces but then the next night it does shine brighter. 
Its hard to shine so bright and draw attention in a dark sky. That’s what we need to do as well.

I ponder and step out on my balcony, I look up and I barely recognise any constellations but I do make up objects of my own linking one star to the other. I see things, people all made up my linking one star to another, it does amaze me.

Wouldn’t it be perfect if at the end of the day we just lie there looking at stars and look at them shine, lose ourselves in them without the fear of getting lost, maybe I’d buck up on my stargazing game and show all to you and you would go on listening to my endless chatter until I would suddenly smile or maybe laugh a little at my silly ways and I would feel warmth gushing through my veins. 
It would be quite magnificient to just fall asleep there under the stars, as they shine for us. 

Now I must get to the point.
Come Stargaze With Me? Will you?

I shall await under my starlit balcony,

Stuck In A Labyrinth, Writing Through It.

Stuck In A Labyrinth, Writing Through It.

sat looking out of my bedroom window, the pouring rain meant I was to be stuck inside my room. For the past few days I had been unable to get myself to write and it was making me uneasy and cranky as well. 

Its strange, sometimes you sit for long hours and you cannot get yourself to write even a meaningful sentence and then again sometimes it takes you just a minute to scribble something worthy. Writing had kept me sane. I had never been so restless in months, I had repeatedly resorted to writing and it had been my trump card on the gravest of occassions. 

We are all in different traps and we spend most of our lives trying to get out, it takes humongous effort to go on. I can’t help but compare life to Subway Surfers wherein life you’re just jumping over one trap to another while time is chasing you. That may sound silly but I was just trying hard to stretch my imagination right there, hoping for a spark.

The rain starts pouring harder and the little rebel in me dreams of sunny days and the warmth it brings, my mind then reverts back to the traps and how they are mazes that can be avoided but then you do grow alot the moment you get into that maze rather than keeping it aside. We all want to escape those traps and mazes but focus on the journey, the journey defines you. 

I think about the times when I feel helpless and my head feels like bursting into pieces. I remind myself of instances, people and things that help me put those fragments back together. We are never irreperably broken. 

All of us are stuck in a labyrinth much like Alaska, but then she never thought she would escape it while I do feel we can. 

The rain stops and I smile to myself, I did manage to write. 

Afterall I too am Stuck in a Labyrinth, Writing Through It.

Maybe What Remains Inside, Remains Intact!

Maybe What Remains Inside, Remains Intact!

We’re all people with dark secrets, crazy thoughts and opaline feelings. There are few who choose to bare it all out whereas there are others who just prefer to bottle them up. The latter are often urged to let it all out, lay their souls bare but one should remember that its just a preemptive measure for letting it out does take away your shield.
There are people who feel that if it comes out it will leave you feeling lighter because the result maybe positive but then chances of that are slim, on the contrary it is much easier to keep things to oneself. Silence is golden it is said and now after further inspection I do feel it is golden for silence is safe. Its a way for people who want to avoid sliding into obscurity all because they let what they had within them to surface. Maybe we’re caging our hearts and our souls and rearing them to be stolen and staked. If you’d give these people the assurance that if they let their hearts out they’d still have it intact then they would ooze their inner words out without second thought. Its just us shielding our souls and waiting for that one chance where we will let it all down and give way to the urge of speaking out, let go of our inhibitions. 

How many times have you regretted it when you let out something you did not want to? 

Perhaps the people who keep their thoughts within are safe but then life is about risking it as well.

Maybe What Remains Inside, Remains Intact!

But then there are too many maybe’s involved!

When ”Human Lust Takes Demonic Form”

When ”Human Lust Takes Demonic Form”

”You board a bus with your friend. You’re all happy and cheerful. When you’re on the bus you keep to yourself and do no harm to anyone , but like a dream turning into a nightmare your world turns upside down. You are raped by hideous creatures who donot deserve to be even called human beings. And if commiting a rape is not enough they beat up your male friend and to top it all they throw you out of a moving bus.”

Writers have vivid imaginations but when I write about what Nirbhaya faced I wish I didnot. The mere thought of those events is like putting a stake through my heart. I am devastated to write about it but to think that you went through that pains me even more. 

It took them some mere minutes to end your life and it took us 5 years to decide to end theirs. Yes some would say that death is not a fair punishment but I would say sometimes you do need to fight fire with fire. It must be mentioned that the perpetrators also tried running over both of them to remove all traces of the crime. I wonder what gave rise to these monsters of lust and are there any more of them. If yes , then maybe we may see another Nirbhaya emerging but I pray to God that the answer is negative.

I wonder what went through your mind when you were lying almost lifeless on the Delhi street on that winter night. Did the world seem numb? Did you reach a point beyond pain? 

In the words of the judges ”Human Lust Took A Demonic Form” but I believe this act made even the demons feel uneasy because that night four human beings commited a heart wrenching crime that one hopes is never repeated. 

”Nirbhaya” you are in a far better world now. I hope some of your numbness has gone as your death wish is being granted but I do know that you will have true justice when humanity is free from hideous crimes like this till then I can only ponder how it must have felt to be thrown out onto the streets just because you were fearless. 

Dear Nirbhaya, we are sorry for letting you down. In a country where women are worshipped you faced death on the streets.

Alas what irony! To every women out there may the spirit of ”Nirbhaya” protect you and to every Indian lets ensure this hideous crime is never to be repeated and give Nirbhaya’s departed soul befitting justice.

Misfits 

Misfits 

For so long some of us tried fitting in, much like square pegs in round holes and every time we did not we were harsh on ourselves. We tried to fit in when we were meant to stand out and all along we were looked at differently for standing out. It hit us so bad that we lost ourselves while trying to find out ways to fit in.

To all those misfits, you’re meant to light up the world not deprive it of light by fitting in. We add lightning to the thunder around us.To all those ubiqutous people around you who try to condemm you for being a Misfit maybe they envy your spark and ability to stand out. You have what they never will. You’re cryptic while they are not. 

People like us, they bring change, they show others a path and discover unorthodox things. 

Here’s to all those misfits who take pleasure in different things, who live life in a way that makes them happy. To all those rebels and standouts. Be what you are and you will discover ways others dream of. Your’e the ones that take this human race forward, break barriers and discover newer, crazier things. 

You are not part of the puzzle , mates you yourself are the puzzle.

To the weird ones. Donot fit in, you are meant to stand out!

To all those misfits, you all are a gift to this world. Something out of the box. So don’t try fitting in.

Afterall No Genius Ever Existed Without A Streak Of Craziness and The Joker will vouch for that too.

Savvy? 

Fictiously Fictional 

Fictiously Fictional 

Its been a while Since I wrote about you. 

I know words won’t be enough and I’ll flounder and toil looking for the right words.
Yet unflinchingly I am here trying to write about you when you are so nonchalant.
Who thought you would turn out to be such a metaphor.
We were painstakingly close to make our not so ordinary love stand out and then it all fizzled out like a flame in dire need of a fuel, what once sparkled has lost its lustre.
I remember our endless calls and how we indulged in silly talks yet we laid our hearts bare over the phone. I just wanted to be your 2 Am thoughts and rooftop date. 

I have seldom had trouble writing but now when I want to write about you words escape, I am like an artist devoid of his colours. 

I still hope you too have words unsaid and texts unsent , I try to remind myself that your’e the one that left, I stayed and now I am stuck. 

I wanted to be your good days and cosy nights, your perfect mornings and lazy afternoons.
Perhaps I am afraid, that what I write will do me harm rather than rescue. I am back from the dark dungeons and I donot want to take another plunge 
Here I am trying to write about our love, to make it immortal although it never was something less than Fictiously Fictional.
MAYBE’S AND ALMOSTS

ALWAYS AN AFTERTHOUGHT

Enigmatic Ways

                    Picture Courtesy : Ragini Saikia

In the words of Captain Jack Sparrow -” Not all treasure is silver and gold mate”
There is much more to life.

We’re all in our private traps
Clamped in them, and none of us can ever get out
Sometimes we deliberately step into those traps. To err is human and I am one, but what about all those times when you were at fault. When you looked at me you saw my smiling face but did you ever see its transition from being forlorn to smiling and now reverting back to being forlorn.
I have already bequeathed my entire soul and possess only fragments of it, but if we began again would it be the same? Would the thrills be like they always were? I won’t mind finding out. But then things are not the same, that’s how the universe works you know. It just lifts you up and bang the next second your’e on the ground and you hardly know what hit you.

I see you in fragments and it is in those fragments that I lose myself to you. We turned into strangers like dreams turn into nightmares. You filled up cracks and crevices within me which had become part of me and now in your absence those cracks reappear. I look at the crumpled sheets we made love on and my mind descends into chaos. I try to decipher every word you said and I realised never had words been able to confuse me as your’s did. 
Its strange how I remember those small things and how the lyrics of your favourite song is stuck in my head. Reading your texts again makes them seem cryptic.
I was making my way through the alley’s of your heart and then you shut me out now I am trapped, hear my cries for help, Let Me Out!

I am stuck in conflict, was all that a lie? 

If you had just told me that with every word I didn’t speak and every conversation we didn’t have our love was becoming evanescent then I would have gathered all those unsaid words and uttered them to you.

Now I am trying to fathom feelings into words , but my words unlike yours will neither confuse nor contradict. 

My soul is desperately languishing in your absence and I am trying to fight these inner monsters and waking up every day to see them remain. These monsters remind me of our unfulfilled love and you wield the only light that can drive them away. Alas what Irony!

There have been numerous times when I have picked up my phone and typed my heart out but then somehow the Backspace button always overpowered the Send option. 

Perhaps someday somewhere we’ll entwine again and let our entangled souls untangle. 

All we needed to do was turn those almosts into forevers and hold on instead of letting go.

You helped me fly and yet you snapped my wings and yet I refuse to blame you because you helped me put together pieces of my fragmented soul whilst I lost myself in you. 

Maybe someday the backspace button will be overpowered by my urge and I will make a fool out of myself but then again I can be foolish when it comes to you.
It was always too good to be real. 

I wake up, my head hurts. 

Was it a Dream? Was it real? 

Hallucinations probably but then again the crumpled sheets bear your scent and I look at my phone the unsent text is still there. 

Stuck in this Lovelorn Labyrinth, I can barely escape your Enigmatic Ways